Impossible Task at Hand

If I am leaving for a beech-holiday trip to Italy the task already seems unbelievably hard. The first question is always: What should I bring? 

I'll need bathing suits and regular clothes for the day and excursions into the city but also something to put on when going out for dinner. Then there is my issue with sunburns so I need loads and loads of sunscreen in every possible SPF available just to be prepared. Shoes? Towels? Do I plan on working out (honestly: NOPE, but who knows what could come over me?)? Games? And BOOKS. Well I love reading and especially on beach-vacations I just bury myself in the stories and devour book after book in a rather short amount of time. This means I really have to be prepared. Nothing worse than not having something to read around. It is really hard for me to sleep before going on vacations because I have to think of every possibility in advance in order to be prepared. Further there is the "Oh my God I am sure I forgot something"-Feeling, this  nagging feeling that I forgot something. I even get this feeling BEFORE I start the whole packing process and it just drives me crazy.

And this was just my thoughts before leaving on a holiday. Packing for 3 to 6 months: imagine my head exploding by going through everything. And take into account the season change.

This task lies ahead of me now, since University starts again in a few days and I am leaving for my apartment tomorrow morning. And I hate it. I simply do. Not even my "Recent Favourites"- playlist or "The Cat Empire" can get me into starting the process this time. 

I've been living at home again for the past couple of months and leaving until Christmas now seems not very appealing. Even though I was really looking forward to go back into my flat and getting my Independence back completely after leaving some (okay a lot) of it behind and falling back into the "daughter-role" here. I really am excited for university to start again and to see my friends again but on the other side just now I get comfortable in my place here again. It's always like this before I leave again after a uni break. It's always twisted and there is this inner fight going on whether I am excited or sad to go. And mostly: it's both at the same time. AWESOME this confusion.

Normally though, after I cried a little when I said goodbye to my family and especially my mum and I go through security control at the airport, most of the sadness turns into excitement for the upcoming  next phase of uni and my independent life in the big city.

But before the scenario at the airport can take place once again, I need to pack all my clothes, chargers, electronic devices, my Laptop, my other SIM-card, books and utilities for uni, bags, shoes, keys and loads and loads of little things. This list would be endless, so I won't even attempt on completing it. But I think you get the picture. 

So now the "Oh my God I am sure I forgot something"-Feeling crept up on me. Again. I think I should give the music another try and attempt the impossible task of packing everything I need for the next months into my suitcase and bags. 

Wish me luck!

Cheers for now,

Maggie

Going "Out There"

The past couple of months I moved back home because of a temporary working position which was more an internship really. I come from a small town, where there are a lot of superficial people. I was sick of seeing the same people I went to school with for the past 8 years again each day at University and I thought to myself: all my friends are doing it so why shouldn't I move out and into another city for university? So I did. With loads of help and encouragement of my friends and family I made up my mind and decided to go out into the world- and I ended up in Berlin. 

Berlin is an awesome city. Very international, multicultural, fascinating and ever changing. Everyday you walk through a city that has already seen so much happening. Sometimes it feels like you can touch the past events and slip right into that time. But mostly you are just allowed to be yourself and do whatever it is you want to do. Coming from this small city, Berlin seemed huge at first but as time goes by I just kind of got used to it that it takes me at least half an hour to get to my desired destination. It's just the way it is. Music is always surrounding me and most of the time I carry a book around in case I miss a train or some bus does not turn up on time (or half an hour late).

Being here in my hometown again for about 5 months now I realised what Berlin and practically moving out did to me. Well did to me is probably a bit harsh... but Berlin and my experiences out "there" made me a person. I know I was a person before- just since I really have a very good relationship with my parents their views and wishes strongly affected me, my personality and the choices I made. Now of course my upbringing is still a part of me of course but I make up my mind about certain topics, about the way I want to spend my days. I don't know if this makes any sense. All I can say is that I am now a confident young women, with her own opinions and believes.

I think in order to know who you want to be and what you want to do with your life it is important to be able to do things on your own, to be independent. And from my experience I can tell you, you get there so much faster if you leave home for a little while, even if it is just for 5 months where you decide to take an internship in another city or do a semester abroad during your studies. But during this time away from your usual surroundings and yes, the usual security of your home, you will learn so much about yourself and about life that you won't regret it. In my case it was not always a simply and easy path, all by myself in a huge city. I had lots of bumps in my road to handle but looking back every obstacle made me stronger. And here I have to quote Kelly Clarkson, because she simply got it straight to the point: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". 

I guess what I want to say is: risk a little and put yourself out there!

Cheers,

Mags

Playlist May/June 2014

Below you find my current playlist. It's a mix between new discoveries and upbeat, spring feel-good tracks. Get our iPod/ Phone/ portable CD or Record-Player, go outside and enjoy the sun and warmer weather! Summer is coming! :)

1. Rüfüs - Sundream
2. NIHILS - Lovers on the Run
3. The Majority Says - Run Alone
4. The Makemakes - Million Euro Smile  
5. Illy - Tight Rope
6. Them 9's - Dreams
7. Alaskan Poetry - New Girl
8. Thelma Plum - How Much Dies Your Love Cost
9. Matthew Mole - Take Yours I'll Take Mine
10. Last Dinosaurs - Time & Place
11. The Cherry Dolls - Wasted Pearls
12. Young Night - Picasso
13. Electric Guest - This Head I Hold
14. Example - Watch The Sun Come Up
15. Parov Stelar - The Mojo Radio Gang  
16. The Cat Empire - Hello 
17. The Cat Empire -  Fischies
18. NIHILS - Are We the Sons
19. Zero Assoluto - Per Dimenticare
20. Benny Goodman Orchestra - Sing Sing Sing

Cheers,
Mags

Being Heliophilic

I am heliophelic.

Heliophelia describes the desire to stay in the sun and the love of sunlight. So yes, I am heliophilic. 

When I wake up in the morning and see the sky is blue and it's going to be a sunny day, I am less grumpy (clearly I am not a morning person) and sometimes the fact that the sun is shining makes my 'not-quite-awake'-self instantly up beat and motivated to start this day.

For me, sunshine makes everything better, brighter and more enjoyable. Don't get me wrong: I am also that kind of person that loves jumping around in puddles of rain and having fun dancing and running around in the rain for no other reason than just because I feel like it. I also love snowy days. But right now- spring in the northern hemisphere- I seriously have such a craving for sun it is unbelievable. The last couple of weeks it's been raining all the time and the sky was cloudy and grey. Then there was this brief window of 4 and a half days of sunshine before it went back to being even more rainy than before. 

In these couple of sunny days I realised again how much sunshine can change the outcome of a day.

If the sun is shining I always spend my lunch break outside. I sit down in this little park just opposite the entrance of the building I am currently doing my internship at. The change of scenery really enhances my level of regeneration and I feel more energised when I return inside and am motivated to give it my best again in there. When I have to spend my lunch break inside I can't enjoy the break time I get. I eat and then I wait until the time is over or simply go back to work earlier than I would have to and I realise that later in the afternoon I am counting down the minutes until I can leave. So clearly sunshine is not only better for my mood but also has a positive impact on my work.

Sitting in the sun, feeling the rays of sunlight on my skin while I have my eyes closed an enjoy the moment is such a nice little treat to lift my spirit and my level of happiness.  If you read my last post on how time flies by you know that for me time passes incredibly fast. So I think it is very important to try and make every day special and worth being experienced. Sunshine i one of those tiny little things in life that are free but can make a huge difference if acknowledged and not ignored.

I hope you are fortunate enough to have lots of sunshine in your life. But still: next time turn your head in the direction of the sun, close your eyes, enjoy the warmth and maybe just like it tends to happen to me, your face will light up, produce a smile and endorphins just like that. Let these little things make your day!

Cheers for now,

Mags

Acknowledging the Now

It's crazy how time flies by- especially when you're busy. A month ago I was already nearly done with my internship in Berlin and now I' already past my 3rd (nearly done with my 4th) week of my second one. When I remind myself or randomly come across the thought that I'm in my 6th term of my Bachelor's degree right now and I've basically got less than a year of Uni left before I graduate- I am simply shocked.

In September 2012 I started my term abroad in Sydney, Australia and the whole 'going to the other end of the world'-adventure seems sooo distant to me now, I can't even grasp the fact that it really happened. It's just unbelievable.

And because time flies by day by day (especially if you're busy the whole day and plan loads of different things additionally to your full daily work schedule) I decided to not let my life pass me by.

I am a very driven person so I have goals for my life and certain pin points where I want my life to be headed, but these goals all lie far, far ahead in the future and by trying to get there (as fast as I can possibly manage) I made the mistake not to live in the now.

During my first two years of University (don't get me started on school) I've basically lived and breathed University. That was it. Studying and going to class took up all my time and I didn't let myself plan other fun activities to balance out all the work. Yeah, grades matter to me, but I'm definitely not an A-student - no matter how hard I tr and how much time I spend studying: I only manage to get average grades, sometimes a little above average... but no higher than that...

Anyway I practically did nothing next to University.

Last autumn (starting in my 3rd year) I changed that: I included sports twice in my weekly schedule and I am really enjoying that. I took the time to go out more and meet up with friends, I went on shopping trips etc. and I really can say: it upped my level of happiness.

I learned to acknowledge the little things in life and allow them to make my day. Little acts of kindness, smiles returned by strangers, new awesome music discoveries or my favourite album ever and simply feeling the sun on my skin, those are the things that light me up each day now- no matter how low my motivation level is that day. I manage to turn these days around and go to bed happy more and more often.

Having goals and plans for your life is important (at least for planners and organisers like me). But only living to be successful in completing your goals in the future can't make you happy in the present. But that's the point, isn't it? Being happy and satisfied would be an every day goal, that still cab be completed every day without losing the big goal out of sight- but making sure to reach it with way more fun (and possibly a few awesome, never expected detours)! :)

That are some of my thoughts put into a weird jumble of words for you for now.
Go and do something fun! You deserve it!

Cheers for now,
Mags